Your mother sucks milk in hell

It's 07:15 and I've just given the boy his morning milk. I'm rubbing his back in a nice circular motion to help him burp whilst shaking my head at the news presenter telling me it's gonna rain all day. But wait - the boy coughs once.. twice.. three times.

And on that third time he coughed extra hard and half his milk comes chucking out of his mouth. He coated himself and his shocked father in stinky milk and I had something like ten minutes to completely change him and myself before he was getting picked up.

God it smelled awful :(